After seeing Hesher, directed by Spencer Susser, I can completely understand why it’s been making the festival rounds for a year and a half without a proper theatrical release: it’s weird as hell. A story about grief and loss and a central character so out there and cartoonishly crazy, it doesn’t ever really mix together in a real way. And while I found myself loving performances and moments, I never loved the film as a whole.

Hesher stars T.J. (Devin Brochu), a young child who is dealing with the death of his mother in a car crash a few months earlier. His father Paul (Rainn Wilson) has spent that time on the couch, barely able to dress himself, and dealing with the pain with pills and support groups. T.J.’s grandmother Madeleine (Piper Laurie) is doing her best to help them by letting them live with her, but she has health problems of her own and seems unsure of what to do. Through some happenstance, T.J. meets Hesher (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), a chain-smoking, heavy metal-loving slacker who drives a dirty van and has a large tattoo of a middle finger on his back. Hesher doesn’t care about anything, setting fires and causing chaos whenever and wherever he can. After T.J. runs into Hesher, he ends up moving into the house by force, never asking but just showing up and threatening anyone who tries to get him to leave. Hesher begins to take a liking to the family in his own bizarre way, and takes T.J. under his wing as he deals with a mean school bully and his crush: on a down-on-her-luck grocery store cashier named Nicole (Natalie Portman).

It’s easy to see why Gordon-Levitt took this role. This is the kind of character that actors can have fun with. I mean, why wouldn’t you want to be the guy who sets fire to cars, throws barbeque grills into the pool, and tries to give advice by telling dirty stories about his life that seem completely underrated? It’s a fun character, and Gordon-Levitt is wonderful in it. The other actors don’t get to have as much fun, but they are all solid across the board, especially Wilson. One of the best parts of SXSW is watching him play such non-Dwight characters and with this (and Super) he shows a range that people are most likely unaware of. His emotional scenes are really powerful, and you really feel for him and his situation. His reaction to his wife’s death is 100% understandable.

Despite the title and the marketing, Hesher is really more about T.J. and his family moving on from a big loss. And that’s where the movie gets a little janky; there’s this big serious and heartbreaking drama going on, but at the same time, we have Hesher telling dirty jokes and destroying things. He doesn’t seem to fit within the confines of the story; if the movie had been all Hesher being crazy, I would have been okay with that, and if he had not been in this, I would have been okay with that too. It struggles to be both. Put it together though and it just feels off.

That said, when it’s funny, it’s really funny, and when it’s sad, it’ll make you tear up. It’s just not balanced; Hesher doesn’t fit in the confines of the story that is being told and some of the elements that are supposed to be dramatic come off lame (especially a singalong to “Teenager in Love” which felt like being beat over the head with “get it?!? They were happy!”). In the end, Hesher is a movie filled with a lot of good that, on the whole, doesn’t feel quite right.

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