Update: Michael Bay has issued an official statement, so just chill out and read it with the original story following.

Fans need to take a breath, and chill. They have not read the script. Our team is working closely with one of the original creators of Ninja Turtles to help expand and give a more complex back story. Relax, we are including everything that made you become fans in the first place. We are just building a richer world.

Those of us who – for better or worse – came of age in the 80′s have distinct memories of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. There was a bright, colorful cartoon series which had very little to do with the dark, violent comic book which spawned the franchise. Later, the world was given three somewhat grotesque live-action films which effectively killed the whole thing off for a good decade.

A 2007 attempt to reboot the series with an all-CGI rendering of the turtles (the forgotten TMNT) proved underwhelming. Now that no one cares anymore, who better than Michael Bay and Platinum Dunes to bring it back to dubious life? And who better than Wrath of the Titans and Battle: Los Angeles director Jonathan Liebesman to potentially helm the thing?

The catch is rather than stick to the tried-and-true origin story of our heroes on the half-shell, (a bunch of baby turtles are mutated by nuclear goo and raised by their similarly-mutated father-figure – a rat named Splinter – to be lean, mean, pizza-loving fighting machines), our new turtles will apparently be some kind extra-terrestrials. From the 2012 Nickelodeon Upfront in New York (courtesy of ScreenRant), Bay tells us:

“These turtles are from an alien race, and they’re going to be tough, edgy, funny, and completely lovable. Kids will believe one day that these turtles do exist when we’re done with this movie.”

Got that? Tough, edgy, funny, lovable… aliens. The majority of this story’s coverage is focusing on the hypothetical anger of this property’s hypothetical die-hard fans at the shift in premise. Frankly, if they can make it work, maybe it’s just the thing this franchise needs to get back off the ground. What else would the reboot have in store? According to FirstShowing, quite a bit.

Turns out the turtles’ origins are being reworked to have them be originally members of an inter-dimensional species. So our beloved Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles may receive a completely new story-line, and reintroduce them as four alien ninja turtles from another dimension! Works for me, actually. Also, FS reveals that Krang may be the villain of this new film and for those that need to a little catch-up, see the frighteningly odd mechanical creature in the montage below.

Teenage Mutant [Alien] Ninja Turtles [From Dimension X] opens Christmas Day, 2013 – whether you’re ready or not.

What do you think of all this? Should they just make them Cowboy Ninja Viking Reptiles From Space and add in Muppets for the hell of it?