Thank the cinema Gods, Scary Movie 5 has found its lead actress. We’re hearing that the next installment in this long-running, little-discussed comedy franchise will be headlined by Ashley Tisdale (High School Musical), who may or may not be joined by mainstay Anna Faris — she has her own doubts about that — or Regina Hall, Anthony Anderson, and Kevin Hart, all of whom are apparently up for coming back. Characters: they’re what count. [Deadline]

Malcolm D. Lee (Undercover Brother) will direct and, with David Zucker, has co-written the film, which you can read a Black Swan-riffing synopsis of below:

“The story in Scary Movie 5 involves the dance world, with a snooty, aloof, imperious, and oversexed French director of a dance company named Pierre putting on a huge production. Jody, a Caucasian late-20′s mother of two and her late-20′s African American friend Kendra are both vying for the lead in the production. Jody’s extremely controlling former dancer mother is determined that Jody will have the brilliant career that eluded her. The highly skilled mid-30′s Diva veteran dancer with the company, Heather Daltry, gets cut from the production and goes berserk.”

Nothing that I say could possibly illuminate, instigate, or change any thought regarding Scary Movie 5 — which is another way of saying that this news leaves no impact to speak of on yours truly — so take this however you see fit. If you want to see the movie, great; if you don’t want to see it, the whole thing should be pretty easy to sidestep from this point forward. Expect it to hit on January 11th, 2013.

Do you think Tisdale could add anything to Scary Movie 5?